Unlock Success: Study Guide for Personal Growth

Growth is rarely linear, predictable, or comfortable. It often hides in the struggles/challenges we face each day. These opportunities, are waiting for us to lean in, reflect, and take action. This little guide will help you recognize, reframe, and act on some growth opportunities through a few relatable examples and actionable steps.

While the examples lean toward hospitality and restaurant settings, the principles apply to any leadership role.

Whether you’re leading a team in a dining room, an office, or a classroom, the climb to success starts with a single step.

Recognize Growth Opportunities

Concept: Growth often comes disguised as challenges or discomfort. They aren’t always glamorous or obvious.

Reframe:

• Growth is earned, not handed out. “Want the View? Do the Climb.”

• Opportunities thrive in discomfort. Success requires you to trust the process and lean into the challenge.

Relatable Example: When the restaurant is understaffed, and call-offs happen, the team gets slammed. Jumping into the fire with tact and skill won’t always be glamorous. But it builds personal resilience, strengthens teamwork, and enhances your leadership credibility.

Study Prompt: Reflect on a recent workplace challenge:

• How has it prepared me to enrich the experience for our Associates & Guests in the future?

Embrace the Messiness

Concept: Growth often feels messy and uncertain. It’s about progress, not perfection.

Reframe:

• Growth is a climb, not a smooth ride. “1,2,3 Don’t Suck.” Start small, be consistent, and improve over time.

• Mistakes aren’t failures; they’re milestones that show you’re moving forward.

Relatable Example: Imagine rolling out a new menu item. Or trying to get your dish on a menu… The first concepts are rejected. Even several tweaks and weeks later, they still bring critique. Not to mention, there are ongoing cost and execution issues you battle… But, every, single, tiny, ongoing adjustment brings you closer to a better plate.

Study Prompt: Write about one “failure” this week at work:

• What did I learn, and how can this experience allow for Associates (& Guests) to thrive?

Take Ownership—Stop Waiting for Permission

Concept: Growth doesn’t require permission. Take initiative and act boldly.

Reframe:

• Growth belongs to those who act. “Do it now.”

• Permission isn’t necessary to be great. Be genuine, take initiative, and deliver +1.

Relatable Example: Think about a time when you saw a problem—like a guest issue at the table—and an Associate fixed it without waiting for a manager’s approval. That initiative turns challenges into loyalty and impacts the Associate’s growth.

Study Prompt: Identify where you’ve been hesitant at work due to fear or doubt:

• What’s one action I’ve been postponing? Today, I commit to __________.

Build Relationships That Drive Growth

Concept: Strong relationships amplify growth by offering encouragement and constructive feedback.

Reframe:

• Great leaders invest in their people. “Heard. Valued. Supported.”

• Build a network of accountability—among Associates & Guests—who inspire growth and challenge complacency.

Relatable Example: A manager who regularly connects with Associates, checking in on their well-being and providing tips to improve sales, task completion, hospitality, etc., enriches both morale and performance.

Study Prompt: Write down three mentees or mentors who inspire you to grow:

• How can I show gratitude and strengthen these relationships this week?

Define Goals Clearly

Concept: Clearly defined goals and values are essential for progress.

Reframe:

• Vague goals lead to vague results. “Mindset. Grit. Integrity.” Define your intentions and execute relentlessly.

• Feelings are fleeting; action drives success. “Fuck your feelings. Follow the plan.”

Relatable Example: Vague instructions at a pit-stop or team brief like “Let’s have a good shift” can be ineffective. Clearer goals create better outcomes. For example, “Today we’re focused on : Each table should be greeted within 90 seconds.” -Perhaps this clarity will help enrich associate buy in, and a better guest experience.

Study Prompt: Define one specific growth goal for work:

• What’s my first step to achieving _______? Write it down and start today.

Actionable Takeaways for Your Leadership Team

1. Challenge = Opportunity: Reframe challenges as essential for growth. “If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.”

2. Focus on Progress: Growth isn’t always glamorous, but every step is worth it.

3. Encourage Initiative: Empower Associates to take ownership and act without hesitation to enrich (guest) experiences.

4. Enrich Relationships: Provide encouragement and constructive accountability among Associates Leaders in your business.

5. Define Success Clearly: Help your team set specific goals and establish habits that drive consistent growth.

Growth is a journey, not a destination. Start now, and act as though there’s no finish line—just the next step forward. Do Right. Be Great.

Reflecting on Leadership: A Marching Band Journey & Dads Perspective.

The Drum Beat Fades

As Bella’s senior year rapidly comes to a close, so does her high school marching band journey—a chapter filled with victories, growth, and countless memories. It’s a season of her life to be remembered, not just for the performances, but for the discipline, focus, and dedication she and her team embodied.

I hope my words bring clarity, even as I write through the lens of tear-filled eyes and an emotional mind. Typically, I type to teach, to coach, or to edify others. But today, I write to process. This post is equal parts reflection and celebration of our Marching Band & Bella’s incredible journey.

Over the past four years, Bella has transformed rapidly before my eyes. She started as participant/contributor, became a mentor, and ultimately stepped into a role of leader and coach as a Drum Major. Along the way, she found her voice, her strength, and her ability to inspire those around her.

For me, this journey has been equally meaningful. Watching her grow has been a gift—a chance to reflect on the lessons marching band may teach us all about life, leadership, and creativity. It’s not just about music or trophies; it’s about the deeper skills and values that shape who we are and who we’re becoming…

The Growth of a Leader & Lessons Learned

As I reflect on Bella’s growth, I see so much more than a marching band member. I see a young woman who has learned what it means to lead with heart, to show up even when it’s hard, and to face challenges with courage and grace. Marching band has been her arena for learning life’s big lessons—about teamwork, time management, resilience, and accountability.

One of the most beautiful parts of this journey has been watching Bella seek mentorship from her directors and those who came before her. I’ve seen her transition from being supported as a freshman saxophonist to supporting others in her role as Drum Major. Bella has gone from following the beat to setting tempo, from relying on the guidance of her peers to being the one others look up to. She didn’t just develop as a leader on the field; she’s becoming a leader in life.

The Emotional Goodbye

The emotions of this chapter ‘coming to an end’ are overwhelming. There’s a sense of pride, and personal joy, of course, for what she’s accomplished. But there’s also a bittersweet sadness in knowing this part of her journey is over. As my wife and I watched her step off the field for the last time, we couldn’t help but cry—for their hearts, the memories, for the growth, and for the fantastic beauty of it all. These tears, though, are not just sadness. There’s some gratitude layered in there too. Gratitude for the experience, for the friendships she’s developed, for the lessons that will hopefully last them and her a lifetime.

Bella’s words after the BOA Grand Nationals summed it up perfectly: “It’s ok. We put it out there, and we threw down.”  — While they didn’t progress as we all had hoped, she reminds me that success is not defined by judges or placements.

“Dad, our success is not defined by old white men in the [press] box.” — Wow!!! That mindset—of valuing effort, passion, and self-defined success—A lesson that will serve her well as she steps into her future. It’s clear that this is something her mentors and marching team have instilled in her. Thankful she’s had an example in leadership, diverse passion, and ALL the guidance through this journey.

As we look ahead to college and her pursuit of music education, I trust that these experiences will be a catalyst for her. The perseverance, patience, and “sticktoitiveness” that she’s developed will carry her through, inspiring others and herself, along the way. This isn’t just the end of a chapter—it’s the start of a new story, one filled with potential, creativity, and the same determination that has defined her marching band years.

Takeaways for Fellow Parents and Leaders:

Parent Reflection: These takeaways may remind us that our role as parents is not just to witness the journey but to nurture, guide, and celebrate it alongside them.

• Celebrate Progress, Not Perfection: Focus on the effort and growth rather than the outcome. The lessons learned and the memories made are far more lasting than any trophy or accolade.

• Model Gratitude and Perspective: Help your child see the value in every experience, from the victories to the challenges. Gratitude fosters resilience and a deeper appreciation for the journey.

• Support Their Leadership Journey: Encourage small acts of leadership—whether through teamwork, accountability, or perseverance. These moments shape their ability to lead and inspire others in the future. 

Leadership Reflection: These three principles can provide a foundation for leaders to foster growth, inspire progress, and build meaningful connections.

• Focus on Progress Over Perfection: Celebrate effort, growth, and small victories, recognizing that the journey shapes the outcome more than the result itself.

• Lead with Gratitude and Perspective: Cultivate a mindset of appreciation, helping others find value in every challenge and opportunity, no matter the outcome.

• Empower Through Action: Inspire those you lead by modeling teamwork, discipline, and resilience. Leadership is built through consistent, intentional actions.

Final Reflection

This journey may be coming to an end for our seniors (and senior parents), but the lessons will live on in Bella, in me, and in everyone our kids have touched. I’m so thankful for this experience and all the incredible moments we’ve shared.

As I look back on this chapter, I’m filled with gratitude—for the lessons, the memories, and the incredible young woman Bella has become. Below are a few photos of our favorite moments, ones that remind me of the winners they all are—and always will be.

Celebrate wins in the struggle. Cherish the moments. Time is fleeting but profoundly meaningful to our development.

Make Today Great! (“Best Day Yet…”)

****A Special Note****

For those inspired by the journey, I’ve created a couple of items (with links) that embody the themes of leadership, resilience, and the pursuit of excellence:

• “Set the Tempo: March to Victory”— highlighting the discipline and leadership needed to guide a team forward, keeping everyone in sync while striving for greatness.

• “We Put It Out There & Threw Down” — a nod to the courage, effort, and passion poured into every action, regardless of external judgment.

These slogans are more than just reminders of the band’s experience; they capture the spirit of leadership that anyone can carry forward.

If you’d like to celebrate this spirit, you can check out the shirt here or grab a framed print here as a visual reminder of what it means to lead with heart.

Leading Through Chaos: Embrace the Climb to Clarity

Chaos Is Inevitable—Rise Above It.

Chaos touches us daily, often feeling overwhelming and inescapable. Yet, for leaders committed to doing right and being great, chaos isn’t a roadblock—it’s a catalyst. The best leaders don’t run from the noise; they rise above it with clarity, focus, and resilience.

Here’s how you can turn the sometimes messy, unpredictable nature of leadership into the moves that drive progress.

Want the View? Do the Climb.

Clarity doesn’t happen by accident—it’s developed. In the weeds of chaos, don’t freeze; instead, keep/start climbing. One foot in front of the other. Each decision, no matter how small, gets you closer to that clarity. Chaos is like fog on a trail. Progress doesn’t clear it all at once. It’s only with each step forward, the path becomes clearer.

Your first step? Simplify. Instead of tackling everything, focus on one or two key priorities. As the one of my favorite saying goes, “F*ck your mood. Follow the plan.” (Maybe a new DRBG t-shirt slogan?) Feelings come and go, but sticking to your directives creates consistency, even in uncertain times.

Lead With Mindset, Grit, and Integrity

Leadership in chaos demands discipline. Your team looks to you for stability, and that starts with your mindset. Choose to see challenges as opportunities for growth. When setbacks happen, lean in a bit, and push through—let your integrity guide the hike.

Ask yourself: What do I want to be known for when the dust settles? When your choices align with doing the right thing, you create a ripple effect that empowers your team into focus and stabilizes their footing.

Simplify the Noise: Deliver +1

In chaotic times, perfection isn’t the goal—excellence in progress is. The “Deliver +1” mindset helps you succeed by focusing on stacking up small wins. Whether it’s one extra solution, clarity in message, or a strong decision, delivering just ‘one more’ builds trust and momentum within your team. Leaders who simplify the noise and focus on tangible progress stand out.

Embrace the Process

Chaos becomes paralyzing when we expect instant answers. The solution? Embrace the process. Trust that each deliberate step leads you closer to clarity. Remember, “Want the View? Do the Climb.” The summit isn’t reached in one leap but through persistence, reflection, and action. Each step; one in front of the other provides this.

DRBG Takeaway

Leadership is messy, and chaos will challenge you—but it’s also where growth happens. I like to say that “If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.” Embrace the discomfort with a mindset of progress, fuel it with grit, and filter every decision through integrity. Chaos doesn’t have to derail you—it can shape you into the kind of leader who not only survives but thrives.

Clarity isn’t handed to you; it’s earned through action and purpose. Simplify the noise, focus on the climb, and stay true to your mission.

Make today count. Go get the view. Today, you climb.